general ranting and associated rubbish

So - I know its been months but I have been ever so busy.

I wonder if you have ever gotten so close to your dream job that it is no longer a dream job when you just miss out?? I recently was advised that a position that would suit my experience and knowledge and expertise, was available and so I trotted off my CV and a letter, addressing the key selection criteria, blah, blah, blah.

Anyways, long story short, I was selected for interview, second interview and was a sniff away from gaining this position. I just missed out. I was informed that they had to deliberate for ages, that my skills and experience would be valued by the organisation, that it is growing and their may be jobs in the future and all of that. However, I dont know that I want it in the future now.

Call me wierd, but this was to be the defining role for my career. It was all about grog and food, events and media, and Melbourne - pretty much everything that I love. And now that I have been informed that I was unsuccessful, I have to wonder has that passion been dampened? Will I want it again in the future.

Now there is every chance that the succesful applicant may well get hit by a fast moving form of transportation - a bus, taxi, tram or motor scooter. That person may fall ill and be unable to commence at the appropriate time, or indeed they may be completely useless at the job, and I might get offered it again. I would always think that I was second best, or second choice. I was never going to be the one they wanted in the first place.

So, the question is this. If you were that close would your confidence be damaged or would you be chuffed that you got that far? Would you want it if you were second best or has the dream faded to a distant memory of everything that you imagine it might be

I wonder what my answer will be if this is the case?